Help the Needy

As you know the depression has hit us hard. We have had to dismantle Badfort and go and live in a Shanty Town outside the Fat Tyrant's house.

Give what you can - knowing that all your money will go to help the glorious revolution and the demise of the Great Dictator's stranglehold on the proletariat !

Giving in the Celebrity Spotlight

Uncle has once more involved himself in some kind of sickening egotistical power-trip.

He has gone undercover on the Badgertown Broadcasting Company programme "Secret Trillionaire".

Be warned, this programme is just a piece of tawdry PR about Uncle - not about the people he finds. They are merely there so that he can engage in some competitive philanthropy.

The fact that he's doing it on TV makes it more horrid still, though of course he probably wouldn't do it if it wasn't on TV, as that would be removing most of the reward. What would be the point of giving without anyone knowing about it?

So Uncle spends a few days in Badgertown deceiving people, pretending to be a poor volunteer. Then he reveals his true identity and laps up the adulation - all the better for being on TV. Hey, I'm not a volunteer at all, I'm Father Christmas. Do you really think I drive a clapped out car? There's an enormous, extremely expensive traction engine at home, I'm on the Homeward Gazette Rich List: at the top. Thank you, poor people, for making me feel better about myself - have a cheque. And maybe when the money runs out, you can come and see me about a loan (typical APR 23.1%).

One wonders whether he'd be any giving at all if it didn't come hand in hand with the chance to be on the telly for an hour. Four times longer than the fifteen minutes of fame most people aspire to. And the chance to see the awe on the young people's faces when you utter the magic words "I'm a trillionaire, you know."

Uncle's Games

Adrift in Space!

Not only have we been beaten to the moon by the fat dictator but we are also now adrift in space!

We have run out of fuel!

As you know our rocket is powered by Black Tom - and the idiot crew, who call themselves my loyal supporters, only went and drunk it all!

They even had the cheek, when I was haranguing them for their stupidity, to claim that I was the one who drank the most !!!

Is this to be the fate of the man chosen to lead Homeward to revolution?

Stuck in this tin box with a bunch of traitors to the cause?

Re-claiming the Moon

The moon will be ours!

Uncle's mission has been sabotaged. We will get there first and with the aid of the dwarfs in our pay we will soon overrun Homeward Moonbase.

The Black Tom that has been being produced on the moon for us, by the bribed dwarfs, is unique and will fetch a fortune on the open market. The coffers of the Badfort Popular Front will be richer than our wildest dreams!

We are issuing a commemorative stamp to record our great achievement. It features myself welcoming the first children from Badfort to the moon.

I confess I was quite choked up at the beauty of this image.

A glorious day for the revolution

We have begun our mission to beat Uncle to the moon!

We launched this morning and if the saboteur we have placed on Uncle's ship does his work soon the moon will be in the hands of the Badfort Popular Front.

I must say that Hootman's rocket is working perfectly, as we watched the earth recede in the porthole we all knew that this day would go down in the annals of revolutionary history as a glorious turning point in the political development of the world.

We celebrated by drinking some of the rockets fuel - Black Tom.

Objective Moon

So that old tyrant Unc, thinks he has stolen the march on us does he?

Well he's in for a nasty surprise!

Thanks to our agent on board his ship we know exactly what he is up to and our Black Tom powered rocket is twice as fast as that heap of junk he is flying in!

We should be ready to launch any day know and our agent has a few tricks up his sleeve to slow down the Dictator of Homeward.

Soon the moon will be another glorious outpost of the Badfort Popular Front!

Another victory for the revolution!

Also we must get hold of all that Special Black Tom our dwarf mates have been brewing for us - Unc will throw a wobbly when he finds out what they have been up to.